One painful part of the process for most aspiring authors, or, for that matter, artists, musicians, entrepreneurs or anyone else in a creative field, is promoting oneself. For all but the most narcissistic, promoting yourself and your work feels awkward and uncomfortable, yet necessary to appeal to the gatekeepers in our respective fields.

Even in the self-congratulatory culture of modern American society, something about promoting yourself feels like it compromises your integrity. From an early age, parents tell their children not to brag, to be modest. For a midwestern protestant kid, it feels unbecoming to tell you all to join my blog, retweet my tweets, or read my book (if and when it eventually gets published!).

Of course, self-promotion is easier in the age of social media — arguably the core purpose of those platforms. Rather than being the bore of the party (remember parties?) who won’t stop talking about himself, you can talk about yourself digitally. A quick tweet or post about your latest project, business or personal adventure seems, somehow, less conceited — particularly when it’s buried in an endless news feed of “I’m so honored” announcements, “we’re so proud of” revelations and other #humblebrags.

In the context of the larger cultural zeitgeist, though, having any self-consciousness about self-promotion seems almost quaint. Arguably, everything in our society, from popular culture to politics, has been commandeered by people whose primary qualification is their unparalleled ability to tirelessly and incessantly promote themselves — Kanye West, Kim Kardashian, Kylie Jenner, Elon Musk, Donald Trump, the latest reality TV show star. With their global brands and millions of followers, they elevate above mere mortals — pounding the drum, demanding “LOOK AT ME!”

In another era, these narcissists and their constant craving for attention might be dismissed for the class clowns they are. But in the age of Twitter and Instagram, these quasi-celebrities are proving that there is only one currency: attention. Good or bad doesn’t matter, attention is the path to building and sustaining wealth, power, and influence. As irresistibly compelling to their admirers as their detractors, these consummate self-promoters have honed their craft. We can’t look away. By exposing every detail of their lives, enabled by technology, we hang on their every word. It’s what has made contemporary life feel like a back-issue of Us Weekly.

So, if you’re reading this, know that I appreciate your indulgence of my self-promotion. Know that with every post, every tweet, every email I send part of me cringes. Although it pains me, I know that promoting myself and my book to agents, publishers and readers is a necessary part of the process. In the grand scheme, I also know that I can’t compete for attention. If Kim Kardashian farts it will be a best seller. I just hope that, through the noise, my story will find an audience.

The Awkwardness of Self Promotion